A Little Girl ...........

Several years ago, I attended a Lenten Luncheon that one of the local churches sponsored.  The luncheons were held from Ash Wednesday until the week before Easter.  The program lasted about 45 minutes and featured a speaker or music. The church had a small lunch you could buy and eat while the program was being held.  The hometown newspaper announced the upcoming schedule every week.

One week, the speaker was to be someone who I had gone to school with years earlier.  She now worked for a non-profit law firm.  The topic she spoke about was child abuse.  Her story began with a little girl named Mary Ellen.  Mary Ellen had been physically abused by her family, who was later taken to court.  There were no laws against child abuse but there were laws pertaining to abuse against animals.  Once in court, the attorneys had to convince the jury the little girl was an animal, otherwise there would be no punishment.  

Listening to my former classmate, I sat in disbelief.  I kept expecting her to tell us that this was a fable or parable.  She never did.  She finished her story and then sat down.  I felt tears come to my eyes as the minister ended the program.

Not having a babysitter that day, I had packed a lunch for my little boy and he was sitting at the table with me.  The people around us commented on what a nice young man he was and how quiet he was.  As we left, I took my son's hand in mine and we walked to the car.  

What kind of world do we live in when you get in trouble for torturing a dog but not a baby?  What kind of world do we live in when we value a cat more than a child?

What kind of world indeed.

Picture this

I have always taken a lot of pictures.  Special occasions or just everyday hanging out, I took the opportunity to snap a few photos.   I had a little 110 camera that required film that had to be mailed off to be developed.  One Christmas a few years ago I was given a digital camera.  I can order pictures from my computer and have them sent to a local store to be picked up in an hour.

Our photos have always been organized and placed in books with labels.  I have made history books for each of our sons with photos of their grandparents, great grandparents and other family members. One day my sister commented that there are no pictures that included my dad, mom, sister, brother and me.  I looked through all of my books; Christmas, birthdays, even our wedding album.  No pictures existed of  the 5 of us, not even a group photo of us just sitting around.  I was very disappointed that we had never made an effort to ensure we had a picture with the whole family.

Eric and I now try very hard to make sure that we have photos of us with our children and grandchildren.  I don't know where our books will end up in years to come.  I hope our grandchildren enjoy looking at their dads when they were little boys,  I hope they enjoy seeing how their daddies were dressed up for Easter and how excited they were on Christmas morning to open their stockings.

As I have told Eric several times, if we ever have to evacuate our home, grab those books.  We have a lot of memories stored in them.

My Special Day

Several years ago when I was a little girl, we visited my grandmother every Sunday.  Once a month after our visits, my mother and I would drive into the city where there were a few big department stores.  Sometimes for a special treat, we would stop at a fast food place near one of the stores.  In the early 60s, fast food places were not common.  People just didn't eat out like they do today.

To celebrate my birthday this week, my family asked where I wanted to eat.  I replied, '"McDonalds", because we were going to be celebrating on Sunday.  I explained that going to eat there would remind me of the special times my mom and I had.

A few years ago when Eric and I were in Illinois, we found the site of the first McDonalds restaurant.  It was exactly like the one where we would eat on Sundays.  It was a good stroll down memory lane for us as we began to talk about our childhood.  Such little things back then now seem like big things.

The 10 of us ate lunch together yesterday.  The little ones had their burgers, fries and orange drink.  Just like I had, years ago.  I wonder if they will remember it in years to come.

My Mother's Life

Several years ago, my mother started writing her life's history.  She thought that everyone should share their past with their family.  She wrote something every week; sometimes it was her siblings birthdates and sometimes she wrote about her childhood.

After she passed away and we were cleaning out the house, we found the papers where she had written the information.  Some were in a notebook, some writings were on a scratch pad and some were in files on her computer.

I brought the papers home to organize and compile them in order.  As usual, my good intentions took a back seat to everyday life and the papers were stored in a box.  A few weeks ago, I got the box down from the attic.

Since my mom had not written down anything in chronological order, I had to read them and try to piece them together.  There were duplicates where she had written the same story over and over.  Even after throwing away some of them, the sheet of papers stretched into 2 rooms.

I have started to retype everything to make copies for my family.  It has been interesting to read what she did as a child.  2 stories in particular stuck out to me.

In the mid 1930s,  my mom was in the 4th grade and some women from a Bible college came to visit her school.  The college had a program where the students could memorize Bible verses and earn gifts.  The gifts included a booklet of the Gospel of John, a plaque and a Bible storybook.  Each week the students would come to school early and recite the scriptures to the teachers.  For learning 500 verses, anyone could go to summer camp for a week.  My mother practiced at home, learned the required Bible verses and she was able to attend the camp located in the N C mountains.  She wrote that camp was strict but she had a lot of fun doing crafts and swimming.  What stuck in her mind all those years later, were the lights she saw from the top of the mountain.  She had never seen sights like this before and it certainly made an impression on her.

When my mom was in the 8th grade, her school had a banquet one night.  Mom's family was poor and they lived out in the country.  The mother of a classmate made all of the arrangements for her daughter and my mother to get from their home to downtown Charlotte.  It was a very complicated time, catching a ride with a neighbor to his job, walking a few blocks, attending the dinner, riding a city bus back to the neighbor's job, then going home.  It made for a very long day and night.  When her older brother found out about the banquet, he took my mother to a shop in town and purchased a new outfit for her. She later said she had no idea how he paid for everything.  But she was very appreciative for everything that had been done for her to attend the dinner.

I have learned a lot about my mother's life.  I would recommend everyone write down things about their life, add pictures and keep it all together.  Share it with your family NOW so they can ask questions about things you have written.  Don't let your past be lost.

Hollywood Canteen

Eric and I recently watched an old movie that had been released in 1944.  The title was 'Hollywood Canteen' and it starred many actors and actresses from that time period.  The Hollywood Canteen was a real club started by Bette Davis and was a place for all military members.  Soldiers and sailors could go to the club, have refreshments, hear music and dance.  Well known bands wanted to play for the crowds, popular singers would perform and famous people would serve sandwiches and drinks.  Everything was free and many men and women visited the club. 

As Eric and I sat there transported back over 70 years ago, we couldn't help but comment on the unity of our country then.  Whether the people agreed with the war or the political party in charge, they were there to support our fighting guys.  Everyone was pulling together and no one got paid for their services. 

How I wish we could go back to those days again.  How I wish that the world could see the United States as just that-UNITED.  How I wish that people were proud when they saw the American flag.  Can our country ever go back? 

Our Attic

I am a sentimental person who has been known to keep something that was broken because a special person had given it to me.  While I realize that makes no sense to anyone else, it made sense to me.  I wish I could be more like people who get rid of something and have no second thoughts.

A few years ago, I decided to really clean out our attic.  Part of this urge was brought on by the fact that after cleaning out my parents house with my 2 siblings, Eric and I had to tackle his parents home a year later.  Pulling down the attic stairs, I took a deep breath and started going through boxes.  I threw away cards and letters from over 40 years ago.  I got rid of my prom dress from my Jr. year of high school.  I shredded tax papers from the year we got married-1979.  (I hope we don't get audited.)  T-shirts from youth sports teams were given away.  We discarded Christmas decorations from our early years of marriage.  I gave away lots of new items that we had bought to make gift baskets for charity auctions.  The 2 bathing suit cover ups that I received as high school graduation gifts were put in a donation pile.  Gifts that we had given my parents were sold in a consignment shop.  I reluctantly carried my dad's old tube case (VERY large satchel) down the stairs to the garbage after holding onto it for over 20 years.  Souvenirs from our vacations were put in the box, taken out and put back in.  Lastly, I sent an old graduation announcement to the family of a deceased classmate he had given me in 1977.

But the part of the attic that I could not attempt was from Andrew and Paul's childhood days.  Some of the items were always intended to be handed down; Cabbage Patch dolls (yes they both had one), rocking chairs, toy chests and tricycles.  Then as the 4 grandchildren started having birthdays, we decided to regift other things.  The 'Farmer Says' from Christmas 1983 was wrapped up in March.  The 31 year old Fisher Price Cottage Family was a birthday gift in May.  A small personalized coat rack was given for a birthday in 1984 and then again in 2014.  I have enjoyed seeing my grandchildren in some of the clothes that their daddies wore years ago.  The clothes were given at recent baby showers, along with pictures of their daddies in the same outfit.

With apologies to our sons and daughters-in-law, you will have to finish the attic someday.  Not soon, I hope.  But the sentimentality is hard to get past.  We kept everything and we didn't mean to.

No 'Negative' Influences

I have recently been looking through some old negatives from film that has been developed.  (For those of you who don't know what negatives are, it is from old school cameras-before digital.)  I collected these in a fireproof box in the event that our house would catch on fire and I would at least be able to reprint our priceless photos. 

I have been able to view the negative strips through a viewer that you hold up to a light.  This viewer was actually used to view the old slides that people had when they used to have slide-shows.  It is a very slow process since the strips are wider than the viewer slot and you have to keep repositioning it and turning it around. 

Some of our negatives are recent; mostly from Christmas or vacation.  The older ones are on the bottom of the box and are the smaller 110 type.  I have always kept our photos organized and in albums, most are labeled with a description and year.  But as I looked at these small pieces of my life, I was reminded of different people who have influenced me and my family.  There were day care workers and school teachers, church leaders and Scout Masters.  Friends and family members of friends who were there to offer their help.   Some of them never were given the credit they deserved for shaping the lives of so many.  Most of them would be embarrassed if you told them 'thank you' for all that they did and would insist they didn't do anything. 

I have enjoyed looking at these; yes, I do have the pictures I can look at.  But some of these have been lost to my mind until recently.  I hope over the years I have impacted someone that could say my name and think 'she was a positive influence'.